If you think that your spouse is cheating, you are probably feeling very frustrated. Sometimes suspecting but not knowing is worse than actually knowing. Sometimes it’s just a miscommunication. Other times, what you suspect is actually true.
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To know for sure, here are some ways to catch cheating in the act:
Get a digital recorder that can keep hours of recorded conversation. Hide it in your spouse’s car and somewhere in the home where you know he or she won’t find it. This will let you record your partner talking or interacting with others. You may also be able to hide the recorder in your partner’s workplace or desk too.
You can set your partner up. Engineer a false profile on the internet and start sending him/her messages. Try flirting a bit to see where the conversation leads. Have a buddy act as a decoy to go on a date with your lover. Have your buddy use a recorder to capture the date and its conversation.
If you can gain access to his/her phone, look for numbers you do not recognize. Track the calls and the times. Record how long the calls lasted. Check those call times against your partner’s schedule: should he have been at work or should she have been someplace else? Try to find patterns.
Using an Internet phone number lookup, see if you can trace the owner of the phones. Determine that person’s relationship with your partner. Some of the numbers might be work-related, so try to eliminate those that are legitimate. The person might also be an acquaintance or old friend, so check it out.
Even if you do not know, pretend like you do know what is happening. Use phrases like, “Don’t think I’m clueless. I know what’s happening. You have this one chance to be honest with me.” If there really is anything going on, your spouse could fall for the bait and admit it.
Drop in on your spouse’s work unexpectedly. Use flowers, cookies, or a surprise invitation to lunch as your excuse. Keep your eyes open to your partner’s reactions as well as those of coworkers. Is your partner nervous or agitated about the visit? How about the coworkers, are they a little surprised or overly interested?
Call and tell your lover that you’re stuck at work or will need to make an unexpected delay getting home. Take some time off work without telling your partner and come home unexpectedly. These types of ruses are the most tried and true way to catch someone cheating.
Use computer monitoring software to spy on your spouse’s online activities. This may have ethical and legal issues, however, so be careful. You can use a key-logger program, hidden in the background, to record a user’s keystrokes and website visits. These programs also record picture-type captures (called screen-shots) of the screen to show you what your partner was doing.
These are just a few examples of how to catch a cheater. Unless you know for sure, do not accuse your partner. Your suspicions might turn out to be wrong and a confrontation may ruin your relationship. Thus, you need to use these methods to help you make the right determination.
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